By Apostle Joy Museba
Psalms 122:1
I was glad when they said unto me; let us go into the house of the Lord.
Who was glad when they said unto him let us go into the house of the Lord? I want to teach on how to talk to a king. The above scripture is a common one that most people use when they want to lead people into prayer or intercession. But when you look into this scripture the question you should ask yourself is who was glad when they said ‘come let us go into the house of the Lord?’ This is not a scripture that would apply to everyone, that is a scripture that is applying to a king.
In this particular case, we know that it was King David who said “I was glad.” Have you ever asked yourself whenever you read this scripture that surely, did David always go to church? I am sure we would all believe that David was always at the synagogue. David is now speaking as a King and he is no longer a shepherd boy or harp player. He is now a King of the tribes of Israel; he is now the King of Israel. He is a King who lives in the palace and there are various activities that take place in the house of the Lord which David would not attend to because of his role as a King, ruling and judging over matters of his people. It is not that David did not want to go to the house of the Lord, he really wanted to go but he was not able to.
It is not everyone who wants to come to church that ends up coming to church. Sometimes God elevates you to an extent that even if you want to go to certain places you have to be invited first. Every time God promotes His people they are given this level of dignity and respect such that they cannot just come. David wanted to go to the house of the Lord but he could not do so without an invitation. The day they approached the King and spoke to the King as a King, David said ‘I was glad.’ If you want a King to be part of your meeting they have to be recognized. Why are you able to talk to people under you more than you are to people above you?
Manifestation of failure in marriage can be seen by failure to communicate with someone above you. Manifestation of poverty makes you want to associate with only people below you and of the same age. Poverty teaches you to only talk to people who are like you or that you are better than. You feel so uncomfortable to walk into a space of better people than you. That is why you are still moving in circles of people who like to gossip, it shows you are in the company of people who are inferior or like you. The way to change, upgrade and prosper in your life is to see, identify and recognize people that are better than you and learn how to speak to them likewise. If I start to investigate how you choose your friends and the people you spend the day with I can predict your destiny. That is why they say “show me your friends and I will tell you who you are.”
One thing that I have seen, poverty is maintained by the poor. Poor people maintain their poverty by staying in their comfort zone; you cannot grow as long as you stay in your comfort zone. Most of the people who are not improving in this life have learnt to talk to people who are like them and inferior to them. If you hear a man telling you that every man is doing it, he is in his comfort zone. Why not spend time with men who openly and publicly testify that they have never been unfaithful to their wives? It is possible to have one wife; it is possible to have one husband. But for it to be practically possible, walk into an environment of people who are living such a kind of life. Why is it you spend your time with slaves but you desire a life of a king? That cannot be possible! We can see your desires through the people you surround yourself with.
Words spoken to a King can either bring the King closer or cause a wider drift. What is it that we must learn? We have to learn the art of speaking to Kings. You do not only need to upgrade yourself in terms of education you need to upgrade your perception of people.
Why is it the king in your house, is king everywhere except in your house? Everyone else respects him except you. He tells you about business plans he has and you do not even support him. Before your king even tries to implement his plans you make it known that you do not believe that he can do it, that he cannot accomplish his goals. Pray to God that some other woman will not get the chance to be your husband’s cheerleader, one who will make him feel that he can accomplish anything he sets his mind on. That is a king you are failing to talk to appropriately. If we ask men their greatest source of discouragement they will tell you that it is their wives. A prayer that any man can make is to be believed by his wife and his wife to have the art of saying it. Why is it that you are able to explain your pain and do a thorough analysis of everything else but you cannot perceive the greatness behind your husbands’ ideas?
If men were really honest they would disclose their greatest source of discouragement to be their wives. We have made bad investments before and having a wife who appreciates your good intentions is good. Not one who is quick to scold you and remind you about all your other bad investments. Sometimes by just knowing how to talk to a king you will be able to steer up some magic within him to do amazing things. Praise him for the little things that he has done for you before expecting him to do bigger things for you. Don’t undermine your king; there is an intrinsic nature within him that does not improve by being told to do better. The improvement only comes by being told “you are a great man, you have done so much.” People are not reading the Bible well, you should read Ecclesiastes 7:2 which says “it is better to go to a house of mourning than to go to a house of feasting, for death is the destiny of everyone”.
Have you ever visited a widow? Ask them what troubles them. Widows should continue sharing their experiences for the benefit of those who have husbands, who will only know their husbands’ worth and value when they are no longer there. A man does every basic thing that they are supposed to do and the wife has the audacity to say ‘he does not do anything for me.’ Is that the way you talk about your king? Spiritually that generates negative energy, instead of motivating your husband he becomes demotivated. Most women are living with men who are without any form of motivation. So they are not able to do anything big because whatever he has done has never been appreciated or praised. Every man functions as a god, do not be the wife who only approaches her man when you want to ask for things. If a man is to be built up through the wife she should be able to praise her husband.
During the peak of Covid lockdown restrictions, a lot of families could not afford to put food on the table. A lot of peoples’ lives became stagnant, school children could not go to school, and some lost their jobs. But look at the steps of progress you have taken, yet you have never made time to appreciate your husband, your king for what he has done. All you can do is to complain the whole night. You hear someone complaining that life could be better than this, yet they have a roof over their heads. All the expenses are paid for by your husband but you keep complaining. You do not push your husband to be better by complaining, you do so by appreciating what he has done; the art of talking to a king.
There is a woman called Abigail in 1 Samuel 25:28-32
“Please forgive your servant’s presumption. The Lord your God will certainly make a lasting dynasty for my lord, because you fight the Lord’s battles, and no wrongdoing will be found in you as long as you live. Even though someone is pursuing you to take your life, the life of my lord will be bound securely in the bundle of the living by the Lord your God, but the lives of your enemies he will hurl away as from the pocket of a sling. When the Lord has fulfilled for my lord every good thing he promised concerning him and has appointed him ruler over Israel, my lord will not have on his conscience the staggering burden of needless bloodshed or of having avenged himself. And when the Lord your God has brought my lord success, remember your servant.”
This woman is talking to a King and she knows how to talk to an angry King so that he calms down. When your husband tells you that you are taking too long in preparing food, instead of saying sorry you are quick to complain. Discussions in marriage should not be about winning but about building. There are people who always want to be right and they are not glad when they find out they were wrong. If you want to build a relationship you should be glad every time that you find out you were wrong. Be a person who is able to say sorry first without giving excuses. Do you know that when you are complaining or murmuring God Himself punished the children of Israel for the sin of complaining? If you did not know, complaining is a sin and the word sin means missing the mark. When you complain you are missing the mark. The moment you speak to your king using the language of complaining what happens next is that the desire of the king to ask anything from you dies. There are some foolish women who will not even notice that their men are changing, they no longer ask anything from them. A lot of men are not coming to church because they see their wives kneeling for the pastor yet she does not do the same for her husband. They show so much honor and dignity to the man of God and not their husbands. Why are men against men of God? They are against men of God because of their wives who are not giving them the respect due to them. But men also contradict their own principles. You know how you want your wife to treat you and show respect but you contradict yourselves. One day you want her to kneel and wash your hands and the next day you want something else. Do not teach your wives that some of your expectations are only for the sake of your image. There has to be an agreement in the things you are doing.
But women listen and take heed of this; your king should be treated as a king, that will improve him. The moment you are able to treat your man as a king, the moment a king is aware that he is a king he will begin to attract kingship favour. You cannot leave a life like a king until you are aware that you are a king and you create a king’s environment around you.
Abigail told David that he had never failed or done wrong before. Nabal showed that he did not know the anointed king although he was yet to be ordained. Everyone in Israel knew David had been anointed King but Nabal was saying who is David? Yet David had taken care of Nabal’s livestock. David decided to go and show him who he truly was, on his way that is when Nabal’s servants told his wife what was about to take place. What she said about her husband’s foolishness was necessary to ease the wrath of the King. Her words kept her husband safe.
1 Samuel 25:39-40
When David heard that Nabal was dead, he said, “Praise be to the Lord, who has upheld my cause against Nabal for treating me with contempt. He has kept his servant from doing wrong and has brought Nabal’s wrongdoing down on his own head.” Then David sent word to Abigail, asking her to become his wife. His servants went to Carmel and said to Abigail, “David has sent us to you to take you to become his wife.”
When Nabal later died King David sent word to Abigail to join him at his palace, all because of the wisdom in her words, in being able to talk to a King. She found favour with the King because her speech was seasoned, she knew how to talk. Every man will tell you that staying with someone who does not know how to talk is a big problem. Solomon wrote that “it is better to stay in the desert than with a quarrelsome and nagging wife”. You have to be a person your partner can peacefully spend time with. Be able to communicate with your king. For every woman to be a better wife, you need to learn the art of talking to your husband whom God has placed above you to be the king of the house. Treat him as a king; speak with him as a king. If you are not able to do it in your house I’m afraid it will not be easy for you to do it at work, in the ministry. You may not be able to recognize authority above you and at the end of the day you may not be able to break into territories of people that are honoured, promoted, great and respected. You will not break free from poverty because of your tongue. Be a person who is able to praise and respect the people God placed in your life, your husband, your boss, people in authority above you. Be able to tell your husband that “you can do it” and he will surely do it
